function text() {
};

text = new text();
number = 0;

// textArray
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>All right, all right, make like Siamese twins and split... And then one of you die....</b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I will not stand idly by while you abrogate my plans! You shall rue this day!... Well, go on, start ruing!.. </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Never! Damn the broccoli, damn you, and damn the Wright brothers!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall KILL you.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Hey there, Gorgeous, how old are you?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Hey, Mother! I come bearing a gift. I'll give you a hint: it's in my diaper, and it's not a toaster.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I had such a crush on her. Until I met you, Lois. You're my silver medal.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>What's this? Blueberries! Oh, oh my G—... Oh, that's better than sex!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Okay, okay. How many dirty stinkin' apes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Sorry Meg. Daddy loves ya, but Daddy also loves Star Trek, and in all fairness, Star Trek was here first.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Is it just me or is rap getting lazier?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I say, Mother, this hot dog has been on my plate for a full minute and it hasn't yet cut itself.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I'm so hungry I could ride a horse. I don't get it. Well, I could ride it to the store, I guess.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Lois, if you still haven't discovered I'm gone, please flip the tape over to side B.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter's voice on tape-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>So broccoli, mother says you're very good for me. Well, I'm afraid I'm no good for you!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Why don't you burn in hell?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Giggity giggity giggity!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Let's blow this sausage fest and hit the international house of tail.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Damn you, vile woman! You've impeded my work since the day I escaped from your wretched womb!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Giddyup, you stubby little mare! To the pancake house! HYAAH!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Victory is mine!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Can I count to three? For God's sake, I'm already shooting at a fifth grade level.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>You must be this beautiful to ride the Quagmire.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>For the love of God, shake me! Shake me like a British nanny!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>You can't sell me you fat son of a bitch!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Meg Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh no. I gotta fart, but I don't know which way to lean.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Soccer moms alll right! GIGGITY, GIGGITY,GIGGITY!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I'd love to stay and chat but your a complete bitch, so bye!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>My daughter needs a makeover like there's no fricking tomorrow.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Soccer moms alll right! GIGGITY, GIGGITY,GIGGITY!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I don't take coupons from giant chickens, not after last time.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>What's that? Oh yes, yes. I love crack. I'm absolutely coo-coo for crack!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>My daughter needs a makeover like there's no fricking tomorrow.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Lois may be worth a million bucks to you, but to me she's worthless.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Hello, 911? It's Quagmire. Yeah, it's caught in the window this time.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>What the deuce?!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>First of all Bonnie, you've been pregnant for like 6 years! Are you gonna have the baby or not?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Stewie, did you unhook mommy's bra?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh! Oh! This story is so good, it must be fattening!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I could take my sweater off too, but I think it's attached to my skin.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Dear diary: Jackpot.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Die, Lois!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Make like Siamese twins and split ... and then one of you die.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Hey, barkeep, whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry martini around here?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>HA! That's so funny I forgot to laugh... excluding that first Ha.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>A guy at work bought a car out of the paper. Ten years later, Bam! Herpes.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>How about a lot less talk and a lot more, SHUT THE HELL UP?!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Love your work..... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin (to Death)-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>And now time for Ollie Williams with the Black-U-Weather Forecast. Ollie?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Tom Tucker-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>You must be this beautiful to ride the Quagmire.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Attention restaurant customers: Testicles. That is all.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I don't have to listen to you! You're a dog! You don't have a soul!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>There's this game where you put in a dollar and you win four quarters. I win every time!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Fat chicks need love too...they just have to PAY!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Now kids, your father's just trying to spend time with his family. Or kill us. I'm not sure which..... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>The ruptured capillaries in your nose belie the clarity of your wisdom.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Okay everybody, for my next miracle, I'm going to turn water...into funk!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Jesus-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Holy crip, he's a crapple!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Well, Tom, I just plain don't like black people.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Diane Simmons-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Your aunt Marguerite is probably laughing at me while she's burning in hell, may she rest in peace.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>My dad worked at that factory for sixty years. That's almost eighty years.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Y2K? What are you selling, chicken or sex jelly?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>What are these? Pancakes? Oh oh, these are delectable. Good news Flappy, I've decided not to kill you!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Email me at lois must die (all one word) at yahoo.com.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie (to Death)-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I'll be Charlie and all of you can be my angels. Except you. You be Bosley.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter (to a bus load of girls)-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Damn you ice cream, come to my mouth! How dare you disobey me!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I love this job more than I love taffy ... and I'm a man who enjoys his taffy.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Adam West-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Brian, it's moments like this that make me sad you're gonna die fifty years before I do.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Easy! Massage the scalp. You're washing a baby's hair, not scrubbing vomit off your Christmas dress, you holiday drunk.. </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I felt guilty once, but she woke up halfway through.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Let's see, soda, purple stuff...Sunny D, alright!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I got no idea how to be black ... y'know, except for not smiling when I get my picture taken. .... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>...and thats for wearing blue socks with purple pants! EWWWWW!!!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie (slaps teacher)-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>C'mon, let's go drink 'til we can't feel feelings anymore.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Lois, this isn't my Batman glass.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>You know what else is disgusting? (He farts and his right eye turns red.) Oh damn, I broke a blood vessel.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh damn! Jeremy is still in the trunk! How long has it been, two weeks? Yeah, he's dead.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Wow! Lois, look at you! You look like Britney Spears! Except not a fat guy.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Those jugs are mine until all the milk dries up. Then you can have the remains!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>So what's going on? You ever get freaky with that thing?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Careful guys, even the slightest prick will pop these things. Gigity.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Hey, baby. How would you like to go black, and then make a difficult decision regarding whether or not to go back?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Cleveland Brown-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Well, Peter, if you plan to pull a party out of your ass, you better stand up.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>So is there any tread left on the tires or at this point would it be more like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I don't need to $@%# impress you.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>When the world is mine, your death should be quick and painless.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I'm sorry, I don't do dog shows, that's not my thing.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Brian Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh, you people can kiss the fattest part of my ass.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>NOOOOOO. Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids. Damn longears, trying to take Easter away from Jesus. Anyway, what was that you were saying?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>If I'm a child, that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if I'm going to stand here and take this from a pervert.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>My dad's worked at that mill for 60 years. That's almost 80 years!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Do these huggies make my ass look big?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Chris, everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh! I feel so delightfully white trash! Mummy, I want a mullet!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Yes, I rather like this God fellow. He's very theatrical, you know, a pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence. Gotta get me some of that.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Tuesdays in the '80s I was always in bed by 8... and home by 11.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Forecast for tomorrow; A few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>God's watching me do number two? Oh man, I'm a sinner, and God's a pervert.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I only drank so that the Statue Of Liberty would take her clothes off.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Baby, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I say mother, this hotdog has been on my plate a full minute and it hasn't yet cut itself.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Chris, that's a terrible word. Nipple.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Lois Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>It'll be a good chance to get away from the evil monkey that lives in my closet.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Oh, Jenny... ooh, Jenny, Ooh, Jenny don't stop... Oh, Richard Jeni, your HBO comedy specials have brought laughter to millions. And what a sweet ass.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Peter Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I think I speak for everyone when I say, New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Tom Tucker-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Here, it's a candy cane. But don't stick it up your nose, it burns like hell.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>I smell death on you.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Stewie Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>It tastes like a monkey. A monkey that's past its prime!.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>HEY GET THE HELL OFF MY... well hello lips, legs, breasts, and ass.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>sorry, I didnt mean to come between you... or did I? .... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Glen Quagmire-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Coming up next: A story on conveniently-placed news stories in television shows. But first, Peter, watch out for that skateboard..... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Tom Tucker-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Wait. Wait! Wait!! OHHHH!!! And boom goes the dynamite.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Cleveland Brown-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Uhh... I'm no meteorologist, but I'm pretty sure it's rainin' bitches.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Cleveland Brown-</b></FONT>"
text[number++] = "<FONT size='1' COLOR='RED'><b>Mom, why is it that when Jesus revealed himself to the world, he became famous, and when I did it I got suspended for five days?.... </b>  </font> <FONT size='1' color='green'><b>-Chris Griffin-</b></FONT>"
// keep adding items here...

increment = Math.floor(Math.random() * number);

document.write(text[increment]);

// where does delete text[number++] fit in?

